cages, eggs, coloured hallways, careful lies.
Once I realized you were all caged up,
Locked behind bars without much to do,
or feel,
or enjoy;
once I realized that I started to see myself differently.
I thought about letting you free.
The little girl inside the cage, crying because of poisonous words whispered into the vines coiling around her mind
by people who were supposed to love her.
She was only a child,
and they caged her up.
only visited when she was crying too loud,
tell her to quiet her sensitivities.
Neither of us was aware of the darkness she was bound to.
But she’s free now.
She colours up the hallway walls,
she hums sweet tunes, screams at her pain, looks it in the face
and says I do not bow to you
and I let her.
Let her say what she wants to say
and don’t let anybody tear her down for it.
When I was a child,
These people, would make wars out of things
I didn’t even know I did wrong.
I had to prepare myself for the next attack,
the next blow
the next time their needs,
took precedence over mine.
I was curious.
Curious about the world,
about us,
about me,
I would stumble upon the sneaky silent lies laid out so carelessly
like eggs for me to find,
but never reveal I found them.
Never hold them up; force them to watch as I cracked them open and reveal their fragile inside.
If they knew I was hunting, listening, watching,
they would breathe fire at me,
and watch as I burned.
I watched as my curiosity shape-shifted into confusion.
Confusion into cunning.
I learned how to dance around the eggs and look like I was floating on air while doing it.
Careful not to misstep,
delicate with my leaps around this mess.
Someday,
I’m going to rip a boulder through this landscape,
and her and I,
will watch as you pick up the scraps.
